Horse Racing with Big Mitch

Here’s what you need to know:

In trial heats, Giuliani beats Clinton (47-40), and McCain also beats Clinton (47-39).

John Edwards polls about the same as Clinton. He loses to Guiliani (46-40) and to McCain (47-38).

But Obama beats Giuliani (46-40), and he also beats McCain (44-40).

Mit Romney loses convincingly to all three Democrats.

Results are from Zogby America Poll. Feb. 22-24, 2007. The margin of error is +/- 3.

My view is that anyone of these Dems can beat the pants off of McCain or Giuliani. But for candidates other than Barack Obama, it’s an uphill battle.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

An Open Letter to Prince Harry from my Pride and Joy

Dear Prince,

I'm not sure if you read my father's blog or not, but after I read of your impending deployment I figured I just had to write.

It's good to see political scions in uniform—provided, as I’m sure you’ve had time to consider, that it’s a uniform from an Allied power. On this side of the pond, we’ve been seeing a bumper sticker reading “Draft Jenna,” a reference to our commander-in-chief’s daughter. The underlying sentiment, I think, is that if those in power had to think about putting their own kids in harm’s way, they wouldn’t be so quick to wage war.

I love my country, but I won’t enlist in support of a war that has, to my way of thinking, been conducted with neither foresight nor accountability. And if you do read Big Mitch’s blog, you’ve read that, mirabile dictu, he’s given a thought or two about a draft, if only to make our leaders think twice about sending young men and women to die.

My Pop says, “War is hell.” Men and women who return from it -- even those who bear no physical wounds -- are often scarred by the horrors of what they must do and what they observe. What effect will war produce on you? Of course, we pray for your safe return, just as we pray for the safe return of every one of our own brave troops. May it also be God's will that your experience fortifies you as a spokesman for peace.

I’ll send you off with a quote from another famous Harry: “Be copy now to men of grosser blood, and teach them how to war.” By “men of grosser blood,” I do not mean the brave British troops under your command, nor my own countrymen overseas. I mean the cowards who hold power in America, who keep their families safe at home while they profit from sending members of my generation to die.

Godspeed … and tell ’em Young Ike sent you!

Cordially,

Ike Schapira

Another old joke revisited

Faithful readers of this space know I like to revisit old jokes when they become timely. See for example: here, and here. Well, here we go again.

First, the old joke:

“Did you hear they cancelled Easter this year? It’s true. They found the body!”

Now for the update, as reported in Time magazine:

In a new documentary, Producer [James] Cameron, [he, of Titanic fame,] and his director, Simcha Jacobovici, make the starting claim that Jesus wasn’t resurrected --the cornerstone of Christian faith-- and that his burial cave was discovered near Jerusalem. And, get this, Jesus sired a son with Mary Magdelene.

According to the article, cleverly entitled, “Jesus: Tales from the Crypt,” one of the tombs within the burial cave is inscribed “Jesua, son of Joseph.” I would say that undermines another cornerstone of the Christian faith.

Cameron's film will be shown soon on Discovery Channel, Britain’s Channel 4, Canada’s Vision, and Israel’s Channel 8.

Too bad that he’s already used the line: "I’m the king of the world!"

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

From MoveOn.com

Subject: It's time to take on Fox

Hi,

I wanted to tell you about something pretty outrageous.

Fox News convinced the Democratic Party to let Fox host a nationally-televised Democratic presidential primary debate this summer in Nevada!

But Fox isn't even a legitimate news channel! It's a right-wing mouthpiece like Rush Limbaugh—dedicated to smearing Democrats. (Recently, Fox falsely claimed Sen. Barack Obama attended a terrorist school!)

There's a growing backlash of people demanding that Democrats drop Fox. Can you help out by signing this petition to the Democratic Party of Nevada? It's really easy—just click here.

Thanks!

"... and tell 'em Big Mitch sent ya!"

The Northern Lights have seen queer sights. (Robert Service)

In the late ‘70s, I had a pal who purchased an abandoned mining site about 27 miles north of Fairbanks Alaska. He aimed to make it a lodge, but things got in the way. The hope was that he could attract Japanese honeymooners who consider it a portent of good fortune to see the Northern Lights on their wedding night.
Down the road was the Poker Flat Research Range described on its own website as “the world’s only scientific rocket launching facility owned by a university.”

Almost every night, rockets would go up from Poker Flat. I always wondered what it was all about. The answer that always came back was they were studying the Northern Lights. It kind of struck me as strange because, frankly, the Northern Lights may be eerie looking, but there is not a great mystery about what causes them. I figured they were part of a spy program that took a peek over the North Pole at our supposed enemies (in those days, the Russians.)

Anyway, today, AFP is reporting that

The US space agency NASA has launched its first five-satellite mission on board a single rocket aiming to unlock the age-old mysteries of the aurora borealis.

The two-year mission, dubbed THEMIS -- an acronym for Time History of Events and Macroscale Interactions during Substorms -- was launched successfully late Saturday after a 24-hour delay, NASA said in a statement.

Maybe I am getting a little hypersensitized to being lied to, or maybe I am just suspicious by nature. But here’s what we know so far.

They have been studying the Aurora Borealis for 30 years or so, and now NASA announces a “new” program. The name of the program is THEMIS, which coincidentally is the name of the the Titan who was the goddess of justice, of whom Homer said, “Themis, who looseth and gathereth the meetings of men.” (Odyssey, Book II)

Soon it will be March, named after Mars, the Roman name for the God of War. History teaches us that March is well named, because wars tend to start in that month. And thus it is that the zodiac sign of Aries begins in March, Aries being the Greek name for Mars. Aries, of whom Hesiod, Homer’s contemporary, said, “ally of Themis.”

It’s thirty years later, and I am still wondering what is so interesting about the Northern Lights that justifies so many satellite launchings, each one of which does damage to the ozone layer. I am still wondering if it’s part of a spy program that takes a peek over the North Pole at our supposed enemies. And I am still wondering if I am being lied to.

“… and tell ‘em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Pitchers and catchers report

It is widely agreed that the Democrats took over the Senate because the nation wants to be represented by people who will debate, and end the war. Today, the minority party blocked debate on a non-binding resolution of disapproval. Here’s how it worked: according to the rules of the Senate, 60 votes are needed to debate an issue. The majority could only garner 56 votes vs. 34 against debate.

People are dying and it might be a good time some for some hardball. Pitch one is a high inside heater. Here’s how Big Mitch would make it so: First – a procedural vote to change the requirement so that a simple majority can bring an issue to the floor. Anticipate Republican filibuster, but do not move for cloture. Instead, let the Party of Bush filibuster till their heart’s content. The image of Mitch McConnell or Trent Lott reading from a phone book is what this country needs to let them know who is on our side.

What is the game plan of the Party of Bush? They aim to have a vote on a binding resolution that they will not cut off funds for the troops. This gives Dems a Hobson’s choice. Either vote for it, and face the ire of the pacifist wing of the Democratic Party or vote against it, and expose yourself to the plaint that “you voted against supporting the troops in harms way.”

Okay, so the Party of Bush wants to put the Dems in a box. Big Mitch says, we need another brush back pitch, to make the Republican’s jump out of the box.

Let’s have a bill that say they will not cut off the funding for troops. Good start, but it needs a couple of amendments. How about one that says: all funds for the surge will come from a Windfall Profits Tax on military contractors? Or, all funds for the surge will come from a rescission of tax breaks for Republicans? Or, all funds will be matched by funds for veterans’ benefits and medical care. Let’s get some votes on the record from the Party of Bush!

Now suppose all of those amendments fail. C’est la vie! The Democrats can walk out of the Senate en masse and let the vote proceed. Sure, it will pass, but in order to be binding, it has to pass in the House of Representatives – the People’s House – and Big Mitch is not feeling it. That’s your curve ball that looks like it’s going straight for the head, but breaks over the plate.

At some point, you have to go with what got you there. In the case of the Democratic Senate Majority, it is opposition to the war in general, and the surge in particular. Do you think the Party of Bush could lay off a pitch in the strike zone: a renewed motion for a non-binding resolution expressing disapproval of the surge? Seven Republicans crossed over on today’s vote and joined the Dems to start the debate. I am saying there are three more, who will have just lost confidence in their knees.

You may be thinking this is a lot of work for a resolution that is non-binding but hey, it’s only spring training. The real season starts in less than 6 weeks.

When the first batter steps up to the plate in April, here’s something to be thinking about:

In the first poll conducted for Newsweek since the State of the Union Address, 58 percent of respondents said, “they wish the Bush presidency was simply over.” Nearly 86 percent of Democrats shared that sentiment, compared to 59 percent of Independents, and 21 percent of Republicans. (Source: CNN Political Ticker)

John Conyers is the new Chair of the House’s Judiciary Committee. This is the committee which has jurisdiction over any possible impeachment proceedings. In a shot over President George W. Bush’s bow, Conyers told a peace rally that Bush likes to fire any military advisors who tell him he can’t win the war, but “he can’t fire you [the people]. He can’t fire us [the Congress], but ‘we can fire him.’” With that line a roar went up in the audience. The loud chant began: “Impeach Bush!”

Sure, the Speaker of the House has said that Impeachment is off the table. But it will soon be time to step up to the plate.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Bob Novak is a traitor

Robert Novak testified today in the Irv “Scooter” Lewis trial.

Novak, in case you forgot, is the scumbag who outed Valerie Wilson, the covert CIA agent who communicated to her husband that the CIA counter-proliferation division wanted to send him on a mission to Niger because of questions raised by the Office of the Vice President about allegations that Saddam had attempted to purchase yellowcake from that African nation. Novak says that he got the information from two senior Administration officials, namely, Richard Armitage and Karl Rove.

The Huffington Post reports:

He describes his interview of Richard Armitage, which was on background.

He asked Armitage about Wilson’s trip to Niger. He asked Armitage why Wilson was sent. Armitage replied, “Well, it was suggested by his wife Valerie, who was employed by the counter-proliferation division of the CIA.” Armitage referred to her as Valerie, no last name.

(I wrote about Armitage’s role in this in Dick Armitage is a poor excuse last September.)

So the only thing that wasn’t handed to Novak on a silver platter by senior administration officials was Mrs. Wilson’s name, which Novak got wrong.

More importantly, Bob Novak knew that she was a covert operative. The entire counter-proliferation division of the CIA is covert. This is common knowledge in Washington D.C., but even if it weren’t, Novak testified that he talked to Bill Harlow, the CIA spokesperson.

Again, according to the Huffington Post, Novak says, “The use of the word ‘operative’ was his own choice. It didn’t indicate he had any knowledge she was an intelligence operative, he had no information she was covert.”

Big Mitch says, “Bullshit! Bob Novak is a traitor.”

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Fart Jokes

Let’s face it: the best humor involves fart jokes, and if you don’t agree, you need to loosen up. Take a peak at this howler from Think Progress:

Rep. Rohrabacher: Global Warming May Have Been Caused By ‘Dinosaur Flatulence’

This week, Congress held its first hearing on the landmark IPCC report on climate change. That report concluded that global warming is “unequivocal” and human activity is the main driver, “very likely” causing most of the rise in temperatures since 1950.

During the hearing, Rep. Dana Rohrabacher (R-CA) — one of the 87 percent of congressional Republicans who do not believe in man-made global warming — questioned the authors of the report about a period of dramatic climate change that occured 55 million years ago. “We don’t know what those other cycles were caused by in the past. Could be dinosaur flatulence, you know, or who knows?’

Now I like a fart joke as much as the next guy, but there is a serious question hidden within it. Apparently, 87 percent of congressional Republicans have their head so far up their asses that a good dinosaur fart is just like a breath of fresh air.

These people don't agree with the consensus of the scientific community that it is 90 percent certain that human activity is causing global climate change. Suppose they are right even though that sounds like another shitty joke. Do these buffoons also doubt that there is global climate change?

Assume that it is the case that temperatures are rising, glaciers are melting, oceans are rising and low-lying land is headed for inundation as hurricanes grow in intensity and frequency. Now suppose this is a natural phenomenon, the result of 6 billion people exhaling rather than the result of 2 billion people driving gas-guzzlers.

Are these Know-nothings going to shrug their shoulders and say, "Not my fault, man! The one who smelt it dealt it!" Shouldn’t even the oil company toadies in the Party of Bush issue a clarion call for American to harness her ingenuity to solve the problem of global warming? And what would it look like if they did?


“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

How to tell the news from old jokes

Almost a year ago, in The Truth Without Jokes, I wrote:

Several have commented that it is becoming more and more difficult to distinguish legitimate news headlines from the ones that appear in the The Onion.

Consider this old story, (as retold by Arthur Naiman, in “Every Goy's Guide to Yiddish”)

Murray and Esther, a middle-aged Jewish couple, are touring Chile. Murray just got a new camera and is constantly snapping pictures. One day, without knowing it, he photographs a top-secret military installation.

In an instant, armed troops surround Murray and Esther and hustle them off to prison. They can’t prove who they are because they’ve left their passports in their hotel room. For three weeks they’re tortured day and night to get them to name their contacts in the liberation movement. Finally they're hauled in front of a military court, charged with espionage, and sentenced to death.

The next morning they’re lined up in front of the wall where they’ll be shot. 

The sergeant in charge of the firing squad asks them if they have any lasts requests. 

Esther wants to know if she can call her daughter in Chicago. 

The sergeant says he’s sorry, that's not possible, and turns to Murray. 



“This is mishagos (craziness)!” Murray shouts. “We're not spies!” And he spits in the sergeants face. 



“Murray!” Esther cries. “Please! Don't make trouble.”

Compare and contrast that with the following news item from the Huffington Post under the headline, “BREMER PAID ‘GHOST EMPLOYEES’ TO AVOID ‘REAL TROUBLE.’”

Paul Bremer told members of Congress today that he was aware that nonexistent “ghost employees” were on America's payroll when he was administrator of the Coalition Provisional Authority in Iraq in 2003 and 2004.

But because the real employees - who provided security for Iraqi ministries - were “74,000 armed men, it seemed a lesser risk to continue paying” everyone while trying to figure out who was actually showing up for work.
…

When Davis asked whether any of that money had wound up in the hands of insurgents, Bremer said he didn't know. But “if we stopped paying them, my judgment was we could have real trouble.”

How to tell which one is real, and which one is a joke? It’s simple really. Look at the numbers changing in the column to the right, and ask yourself this: “Which one isn't really funny?”

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Memo to Hillary

Need more humor. The “evil men” joke was a good start, but unfortunately it reminded us of what we hated most about Big Dog.

Here’s a suggestion for the next time someone asks you, “Knowing what you know now, would you have voted to authorize the use of force in Iraq?”

Answer: “If I knew then what I knew now, I would have bet everything on Point Given in the 2001 Belmont Stakes.”


“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

What happens when a blogger relies only on the mainstream media

Your faithful correspondent is determined to mine the mainstream media to find news of interest and to provide a unique analysis drawing on my personal political point of view and memories that extend back to the 1960’s. The problem is that the mainstream media often gives short shrift to news items that are inconvenient to their corporate interests. For example, a story that suggests that King George the Incompetent was not fairly elected is bad for business in two ways.

First, take a company like General Electric, one of the largest military contractors in the U.S. and the owner of the National Broadcasting Company. Well, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that bashing Bush is bad for business. And by the way, they got plenty of rocket scientists.

Second, take a company like the Fox network. It is obvious that by being pitchmen for the administration, the reporters have gained access at an unprecedented level. Dumb Dubya got Tony Snow a job, and the rest of us have been getting a snow job ever since.

Nevertheless, every once in a while, I glean little tidbit from some out of the way media source. That’s when my blogger instinct kicks in. For example, I ran across this little nugget in the Seattle Post Intelligencer: Election Staff convicted in recount rig.

CLEVELAND -- Two election workers were convicted Wednesday of rigging a recount of the 2004 presidential election to avoid a more thorough review in Ohio’s most populous county.

Jacqueline Maiden, elections coordinator of the Cuyahoga County Elections Board, and ballot manager Kathleen Dreamer each were convicted of a felony count of negligent misconduct of an elections employee. They also were convicted of one misdemeanor count each of failure of elections employees to perform their duty.

Prosecutors accused Maiden and Dreamer of secretly reviewing preselected ballots before a public recount on Dec. 16, 2004. They worked behind closed doors for three days to pick ballots they knew would not cause discrepancies when checked by hand, prosecutors said.

Though the article makes no mention of it, an accompanying picture shows Rosie Grier, (see below) who was acquitted on all seven counts of various election misconduct or interference charges.

And this is where the perspective of a veteran of the sixties comes in handy. You see, this ex-hippy is old enough to remember Rosie Grier, pictured here (second from left) when he was one of the “Fearsome Foursome,” the only complete defensive line all enshrined in the NFL Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio. He is also remembered for serving as a bodyguard for his friend, U.S. Senator and presidential candidate Robert Kennedy, although he was hanging with Ethel Kennedy the night that Kennedy was assassinated in Los Angeles in 1968. According to my recollection, it was Rosie who seized the weapon used to shoot RFK. (Others say it was Rafer Johnson.)

The point is that the mainstream media provides no context to how this courageous defender of an icon of the liberal wing of the Democratic Party could ever be suspected of stealing an election for Dumb Dubya.

Let’s review what we know so far. This paragon of toughness was also an ordained minister, and the author of a book called “Needlepoint for Men.” Clearly, he had (shall we say?) a sensitive side. His autobiography is entitled “Rosey: The Gentle Giant.”

But if it weren’t for bloggers like Big Mitch who are willing to look beyond the scant reporting provided by the mainstream media, nobody would ever wonder how he turned into the person shown in the picture that accompanied the Seattle PI article:


Come to think of it, the mainstream media didn’t do a whole helluva lot of reporting about the fact that people were convicted in Ohio of rigging the election that put George W. Bush in office for a second term.

Somehow, I am left with the feeling that I may be missing a part of the story.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Habeas Corpus explained

In Them’s fighting words, I tried to explain why calling Generalissimo Gonzales a fascist is justified. It has to do with his denial of the supremely obvious fact that the Constitution guarantees the right of Habeas Corpus to Americans.

Since that time, a half a million people protested against this administration in Washington, D.C. and many more in local demonstrations throughout our country. But the outrage did not ostensibly extend to the attack on basic civil rights by the Party of Bush.

I suppose the problem lies in the fact that the concept of Habeas Corpus is not widely understood, and therefore, the central role it has in the idea of ordered liberty is not appreciated. Along comes Larry Beinhart on Huffington Post. In an article entitled, What Habeas Corpus Means to You he explains what’s so great about the Great Writ. Here it is in a nutshell:

It is fundamental to - and a sort of shorthand for - the right to be in a legal system, with laws and judges, evidence and a defense.

…

Under Habeas Corpus, you have the right to say, I want to be brought into the court to determine if I am the right person charged, if there's an actual law prohibiting what I'm charged with, if the people who are holding me have the jurisdiction to do so, and I want that publicly known and I want the right to dispute all of that and the right to be tried too.


Without Habeas Corpus you can be swept up off the street and never heard from again. Period. Nobody has to know. Nobody - including yourself - has to know why. Nobody gets to determine if there is a law against what you're charged with. You have no rights at all.

Big Mitch is not the only one calling the Party of Bush fascists. Read Larry Beinhart’s article to see how he puts it succinctly:

Habeas Corpus means you are in a society of laws. Without it, you are in the land of Saddam Hussein, August Pinochet, Adolf Hitler, Josef Stalin, Ivan the Terrible ... and ...

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Fuck the Draft, Redux

In the pre-quel to this post, I wrote:

In the past, we needed to institute a draft to protect us from the Fascism of the Axis powers. Later, we imposed a draft in the vain belief that we needed it to protect us from the totalitarianism of Chinese Communism and Soviet world domination. Now, as Charlie Rangel argues, we may need to institute a draft to protect us from American fascism. He’s got a point there.

An article, Fighting in Iraq, Afghanistan stirs thoughts of resurrecting draft, in the Anchorage Daily News on January 28th proves the point.

The Army now has about 512, 000 active duty soldiers. Bush intends to add 92,000 soldiers and marines over the next five years, which is about an 18% increase. Regarding the draft, the article reported:

“The Pentagon estimates that it would cost about $4 billion more a year to reinstate the draft. New facilities would have to be built to train and house the large numbers of inductees who’d be brought into uniform each year.”

Wait just a doggone minute!

First of all, when was the last time you heard someone in the Pentagon kvetch about spending money. It’s a new one on me.

Second, just because you have a draft, doesn’t mean you have to call up anything close to the number of young people who are eligible. The article states:

About 4 million men and women reach military age each year, but the military needs only a small fraction of that number. That’s a fact that those who argue for a return to the draft tend to overlook, said Bernard D. Rostker, the author of “I want You: The Evolution of the All-Volunteer Force.”

Okay, Bernie, so now I am laser focused on it. The way I figure, if 4 million young people come of military age, you need to draft about 2.3% of them to meet the 92,000 goal stated by the Bush administration.

You could accomplish this goal by putting 365 slips of paper in a fishbowl with a different day of the year written on each one. Randomly select 10, and if your birthday is called, you have been selected to serve by your Selective Service. If this plan is followed, the Pentagon will have enough draftees to meet the goal, even after allowing for deferments and exclusions.

Since King George the Incompetent has announced that he intends to enlist this many anyway, the additional cost should be limited to the price of a fishbowl and 365 slips of paper. You can use the change from that $4 Billion to make sure the draftees, and the enlistees, are well equipped.

I am at a total loss to understand why the Generals in the Pentagon would oppose this plan unless it is because Generals do what they are told to do by the civilian leadership in the Pentagon and the White House. And, as I argued in Fuck the Draft, a draft would protect this country from homegrown fascism. That’s got to be bad for the current White House residents, and their fellow travelers in the Party of Bush.

Let me be perfectly clear. I am not advocating in favor of a draft. I still can’t overcome the feeling that involuntary servitude is against deeply held beliefs about what America promises her citizens. Moreover, I don’t trust the government with the lives of young people. But in the arguments for and against the idea, I see responsible people on the left arguing that our country is at risk of falling into fascism, and on the right, I see people providing the evidence.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

A series of sub-clinical doses

Back in the 1970’s, Anchorage Alaska was a wild western town. The building of the trans-Alaska pipeline put huge amounts of cash into the hands of people who didn’t have much experience with that kind of money. Many young men worked hard on the North Slope (where there was no opportunity to spend money) for a two-week shift and then they partied even harder in a town where they had no family. It is not surprising that in those days before the rise of Aids and the invention of crack, that sex, drugs and rock’n’roll were the order of the day.

I suppose it was like the boomtowns where George W. Bush being an irresponsible youth in 1972, when he was arrested for cocaine possession. (Not to be confused with his arrests for theft and vandalism in 1968, and drunk driving in 1976.)

Cocaine sold in those days for about $100 a gram, about the price of 117 gallons of gasoline. (Today, you would have to pay $300 bucks for that much gas.) Even a rich, well connected party animal like George W. Bush who went to the expense and trouble of acquiring a gram of coke was likely to want to make it last.

And therein hangs a tale.

See, in order to ration out the cocaine, a lot of people would do a little bit, and then wait for the cocaine to take effect. After a period of time, they would feel that for $100 bucks, they should be feeling a little more euphoric, and so, they would take another little bit.

Problem was, the first little bit had worn off, its de minimus effects unnoticed, and now the second little bit, had the same unnoticeable effect. A parsimonious user could go through an entire gram of cocaine with no noticeable effect, other than the loss of a C note. I knew a woman with a medical background who used a memorable phrase to describe the phenomenon: “a series of sub-clinical doses.”

After 9/11, it made sense to go after the Taliban in Afghanistan, who had harbored the murderous al Qaeda. We sent in CIA, troops and airpower and destroyed the leadership in Afghanistan. But we did not root out all the supporters of the Taliban. Rather, we used just enough force to get the job almost done and then we pulled off troops to make them available for the adventure in Iraq. Today, the Taliban is resurgent in Afghanistan.

King George the Incompetent started a war in Iraq with just enough troops to defeat an enemy that had not been allowed to re-arm since the time his father defeated them in the first gulf war. The troops – and God bless ’em every one – won the war, but there simply weren’t enough of them to keep the peace.

As a result of the failure of planning –actually a failure to pay attention to the plans that Pentagon planners had made -- there are armed militias and they are engaged in a civil war. We are told that the Shi’ite armed militias are armed by Iran, and it makes sense to me.

You would think that after losing 3,000 troops, and spending $361 trillion we should have a little more to show for it than a banner on an aircraft carrier proclaiming “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.”

Now Dumb Dubya wants to surge the number of troops. You might call it an escalation, but that would be considered tasteless, since it is redolent of Viet Nam. He’s talking about sending in another 21,500 troops, which is about a 15% increase. You might look at it as just another in a series of sub-clinical doses.

King George the Incompetent decided before the war that he would not heed the advice of anyone who knew what they are doing. He would send in just enough troops to not get the job done. That’s why I described this plan as “more of the same, only more so.”

That Dubya is as steady as a rock. Only dumber.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Shamelessly lifted from Slate.com

Bush's Baby Einstein Gaffe
The president lionizes a mountebank.
By Timothy Noah

In his Jan. 23 State of the Union address, President Bush paused briefly to pay tribute to a few everyday American heroes who'd been brought to the Capitol to sit beside his wife during the speech. It's a State of the Union tradition that began in 1982, when Ronald Reagan saluted Lenny Skutnik, a federal employee who, two weeks earlier, had plunged into the icy Potomac during a snowstorm to rescue the survivor of an airline crash. For the succeeding 25 years, every January some hapless White House functionary has been called upon to find a few new heroes to park next to the first lady in the House visitor's gallery. The supply was bound eventually to run a little thin, but whoever chose Julie Aigner-Clark, founder of the Baby Einstein Co., should have done a little more research.

There she was, sitting with Wesley Autrey, who leapt in front of a New York City subway train to rescue a complete stranger, and Army Sgt. Tommy Reiman, who repelled an enemy attack in Iraq with two legs full of shrapnel and bullet wounds in his arms and chest. Aigner-Clark's presence was, to say the least, incongruous. Here is how Bush summarized her achievement:

After her daughter was born, Julie Aigner-Clark searched for ways to share her love of music and art with her child. So she borrowed some equipment, and began filming children's videos in her basement. The Baby Einstein Company was born, and in just five years her business grew to more than $20 million in sales. In November 2001, Julie sold Baby Einstein to the Walt Disney Company, and with her help Baby Einstein has grown into a $200 million business. Julie represents the great enterprising spirit of America. And she is using her success to help others—producing child safety videos with John Walsh of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. Julie says of her new project: "I believe it's the most important thing that I have ever done. I believe that children have the right to live in a world that is safe." And so tonight, we are pleased to welcome this talented business entrepreneur and generous social entrepreneur—Julie Aigner-Clark.

That's high praise for a businesswoman who (if I may be permitted a cynical moment) gave not a dime either to Bush or to the Republican National Committee during the last four election cycles. [See, clarification at end of article.] What is Aigner-Clark's achievement? She got rich marketing videos to infants. No one told the president, I presume, that this profit-making scheme ignores advice from the American Academy of Pediatrics that children under 2 years of age shouldn't watch TV. One recent study went so far as to suggest, plausibly, that too much TV at so early an age can be a risk factor for autism. (See the Oct. 2006 Slate piece, "TV Might Really Cause Autism" by Gregg Easterbrook.)

Baby Einstein is part of what Alissa Quart, in an August 2006 piece in the Atlantic ("Extreme Parenting"), called the Baby Genius Edutainment Complex, an industry that preys on the status anxiety of neurotic parents who, until Aigner-Clark and others told them otherwise, didn't sweat the meritocratic rat race until it was time to place their pint-sized strivers in preschool. That changed in the mid-1990s, when Don Campbell, extrapolating wildly from earlier research involving college students that, Quart writes, has never been duplicated, trademarked the slogan "Mozart effect" and used it to market classical-music CDs for infants. Aigner-Clark followed suit with her Baby Einstein videos in 1997.

"Essentially," Harvard Medical School psychologist Susan Lynn told the Chicago Tribune "Media Mom" (and occasional Slate contributor) Nell Minow in December 2005,the baby video industry is a scam. There's no evidence that the videos are educational for babies, and a review of the research on babies and videos concludes that while older babies can imitate simple actions from a video they've seen several times, they learn much more rapidly from real life.

In May, a child-advocacy nonprofit filed a complaint to the Federal Trade Commission about Aigner-Clark's creation, alleging that claims made on the videos' behalf (example: With Baby DaVinci, "your child will learn to identify her different body parts, and also discover her five senses … in Spanish, English, and French!") are deceptive and false. Filed with the complaint were letters of support from the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. "The reality," wrote the American Academy of Pediatrics, "is that parents play the videos to give themselves some time to do other household chores, like cooking dinner or doing laundry. However, they shouldn't be led to believe that it helps their baby."

There's a sucker born every minute, but only a select few get to be president of the United States.

Clairification, Jan. 25: As usual, my problem isn't that I'm too cynical but rather that I'm not cynical enough. A reader alerts me that although Julie Aigner-Clark didn't contribute to Bush or the Republican National Committee during the last four election cycles, her husband and business partner, William E. Clark, gave $5,150 to Bush and the RNC during the 2004 cycle.

Timothy Noah is a senior writer at Slate. The original article, complete with illunimating hyperlinks is located here.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Them’s fighting words

In Chaplinsky v. New Hampshire 315 U.S. 568 (1942) the United States Supreme Court affirmed a conviction under a New Hampshire statute prohibiting the use of offensive or annoying words when addressing another person in public. Chaplinsky had called the local constable a “damned fascist.” These are fighting words, outside the protection of the First Amendment’s protection of free speech, made applicable to the States by the Fourteenth Amendment.

I am calling Generalissimo Alberto Gonzales a damned fascist right now. I’ll get to the why in a minute, but first a little more law lessons.

The 5th Amendment to the Constitution guarantees to Americans something called “due process.” The founders were brilliant in their recognition of the fact that they were creating a republic that would last for years, and that the idea of fundamental fairness would evolve and mature, as indeed society has. Thus, they kept some things intentionally vague, confident that wise and good men would flesh out the skeleton they had created. Consider for example such phrases as “cruel and unusual punishment.”

The founders were learned in English Common Law, which serves as the basis of American law. Since the mid-12th century, anyone imprisoned has had the right to petition the court and obtain a writ, commanding the jailer to bring the prisoner to court and explain the reasons for the imprisonment. By 1305, the writ was known as Habeas Corpus, and Blackstone recorded its use.

In Harris v. Nelson, 394 U.S. 286, 290-91 (1969) the Supreme Court recognized the fact that “[t]he writ of habeas corpus is the fundamental instrument for safeguarding individual freedom against arbitrary and lawless state action.”

Without the Great Writ, as it is known, the other freedoms are meaningless. You can have free speech, or freedom of religion, or the right to assemble and petition your government; you can have your guarantees of freedom from unreasonable searches and seizures, but it all doesn’t mean a damned thing if you have no recourse when the government snatches you up and holds you indefinitely for exercising those rights.

When the federal government deprives you of life, liberty or property, the Fifth Amendment guarantees that a certain amount of procedural safeguards are due to you. That’s what the Constitution calls “due process.” After the Civil War the Constitution was amended and the 14th Amendment imposed the requirement of due process upon the States and their political subdivisions. And for the last 700 years at least, the concept of due process has included the Great Writ of Habeas Corpus.

Do you want to know about the Original Intent of the Framers? Here’s a clue: Article I, Section 9, of the Constitution states that “the privilege of the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall not be suspended, unless when in Cases of Rebellion or Invasion the public Safety may require it.”

All of which is background to why I am calling Generalissimo Alberto Gonzales a fascist. In today’s Baltimore Chronicle and Sentinel, I read:

Alberto Gonzales questioned whether the U.S. Constitution grants habeas corpus rights of a fair trial to every American.

Responding to questions from Sen. Arlen Specter at a Senate Judiciary Committee hearing on Jan. 18, Gonzales argued that the Constitution doesn’t explicitly bestow habeas corpus rights; it merely says when the so-called Great Writ can be suspended. “There is no expressed grant of habeas in the Constitution; there’s a prohibition against taking it away,” Gonzales said.

Gonzales’s remark left Specter, the committee’s ranking Republican, stammering. “Wait a minute,” Specter interjected. “The Constitution says you can’t take it away except in case of rebellion or invasion. Doesn’t that mean you have the right of habeas corpus unless there’s a rebellion or invasion?”

Sure, calling Generalissimo Gonzales a damned fascist is fighting words. It is a call to action: we must oppose these tyrants, while there is still time.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Does a leopard change his spots?

A little more than a year ago, it was discovered that the Bush administration was wiretapping Americans in a clear-cut, no-doubt-about-it violation of the Constitution and statutory law. The only court to rule on the matter agreed with this judgment. King George the Incompetent, and Attorney General Alberto Gonzales announced that they would keep on doing it and Congress, controlled by Republicans, responded by saying, “Yes, Your Highness: Your wish is our command.”

There is a new Congress in town, and it has no intention of giving King George a free pass. The administration responded by saying, in essence, “Okay, we’ll stop breaking the law.” This is confusing to many because obeying the law is so out of character for this crop of crooks.

My experience tells me that people who have been rewarded all their lives for living a certain way do not change after age 50. Dumb Dubya has believed since he was a child that the rules do not apply to him. He has surrounded himself with enablers and Alberto Gonzalez is the prime example.

Of course, people will change their conduct if the fear of getting caught or punished arises, and it is an obvious conclusion that this is what happened in this instance. Senator Arlen Spector was among the many who suggested as much when Generalissimo Gonzalez testified yesterday in the Senate Judiciary Committee.

Big Mitch arrives at a different conclusion. I think that the Party of Bush administration has no intention of obeying the law and that the announcement of Generalissimo Gonzalez is no more than throwing sand in our eyes.

Let’s take a clearer look. El Generalissimo says that the administration has worked out an agreement, which took the form of an order from the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Court, according to which it would over-see the domestic spying program.

The presiding judge of the FISA court said she had no objection to disclosing legal orders and opinions about the program that targets people linked to al-Qaida, but the Bush administration would have to approve release of the information.

El Generalissimo is not giving his approval, he told incredulous Senators.

“Are you saying that you might object to the court giving us a decision that you publicly announced?” asked committee chairman Sen. Patrick Leahy, D-Vt. “Are we Alice in Wonderland here?”

Responding, Gonzales said “there is going to be information about operational details about how we’re doing this that we want to keep confidential,” as if letting the Chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee know how the program worked were the same thing as putting the court’s agreement in sky-writing over Islamabad.

Meanwhile, over in the House Intelligence Committee, members were being treated to testimony from John Negroponte, the National Intelligence Director. If you can’t trust him, whom can you trust? Think back to the heady days of Iran-Contra, when he was the ambassador to Honduras, during which time military aid to Honduras rose from $4 million to 77.4 million a year, presumably to the benefit of the Contras. He was an enthusiastic supporter of the Honduran military chief who was blamed for having death squads with which he dealt with political opponents, a fact which Senator Dodd accused Negroponte of disingenuously withholding from Congress.

But what has Negroponte done for us lately? Testifying before the House Intelligence Committee yesterday, he said there may be separation of powers issues involved in turning over information to Congress about the program.

Did you catch that? It’s not being withheld on the basis of operational security. There’s a principle involved, and that principle is that the present administration is simply not going to admit that Congress has a role to play in running the country.

Maybe they ought to re-read the Constitution. I especially invite their attention to Article II, Section 4:

The President, Vice President and all civil Officers of the United States, shall be removed from Office on Impeachment for, and Conviction of, Treason, Bribery, or other high Crimes and Misdemeanors.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Of apologies and impugning the integrity of others

Consider Charles “Cully” Stimson, Esq., the scion of timber barons and a member of one of the richest, most influential and deeply rooted families in the Pacific Northwest. He is the Deputy Assistant Secretary of Defense for Detainee Affairs and a disgrace to the legal profession.

In a radio interview last week, Stimson spoke of the many ultra-prestigious law firms that provide pro bono legal services to detainees in Guantanamo. Like a good fascist, he named names. He said that companies might want to consider taking their business to other firms that do not represent suspected terrorists.

Today, he ‘apologized’ in a letter to the Washington Post:

Regrettably, my comments left the impression that I question the integrity of those engaged in the zealous defense of detainees in Guantanamo.

His original comments left no such impression: he never implied that they were unethical. If I had to bet, I would say that he is irked that, dig as he might, he can’t find a grain of dirt on any of them.

Stimson was very explicit: he was encouraging the punishment of the many prestigious law firms who were supplying attorneys on a pro bono basis to detainees in Guantanamo Bay. This is crude intimidation of those who are working for free to preserve our Constitution, and it is beneath contempt. It is the hallmark of fascists. If Stimson had a conscience have been apologizing for that.

It would be comforting to think that Stimson’s despicable attack were an isolated incident. After all, it was quickly disavowed by the Pentagon. But alas, such attacks are typical of the fascistic Party of Bush.

Tonight, Keith Olbermann reported that the Bushies are in the process of purging 7 U.S. Attorneys and giving no public explanation. One of them, Carol Lam, is responsible for the Duke Cunningham conviction, and according to Dianne Feinstein, she has subpoenas out for other members of Congress. The concern is that the purge is payback for going after corruption. A purge of those who are not loyal to the Party of Bush – it’s just so typical of these fascists.

A provision in last year’s re-authorization of the Patriot Act allows Attorney General Alberto Gonzales to appoint interim U.S. Attorneys for indefinite period of time. (Previously, interim prosecutors were appointed by courts.) One of Gonzales’s appointments is a 37-year-old attorney whose previous work experience consisted of digging up dirt on Democrats. Fat chance he will be prosecuting any corrupt Republicans. Consolidation of power in the hands of a unitary executive is also typical of fascists.

Get it, Stimson? That’s how you impugn the integrity of others. And I got nothing to apologize for.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Tim Russert asks a good question

On Meet the Press today, he asked Stephen Hadley, National Security Advisor to the President:

If you were wrong about weapons of mass destruction, you were wrong about the troop levels necessary, you were wrong about the costs of the war, you were wrong about oil revenues paying for reconstruction, you were wrong about being greeted as liberators, you were wrong about the level of sectarian violence, why should the American people trust you know and think you are right about a surge?

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”

Are you as outraged as I am?

All I wanted to do was sit on my sofa and watch a little football. I am just an American dad always hoping to spend quality family time with my two teenage children. And what could be more American and wholesome than watching the Philadelphia Eagles play the New Orleans Saints?

And then it happened. Thirty three minutes into the broadcast, with 8:37 left in the first quarter, the Eagles quarterback, Jeff Garcia threw long into double coverage, and the ball was knocked away from Dante Stallworth. The Fox network coverage at this point cut away to a pretty blonde in the crowd celebrating the defensive prowess of her hometown Saints. For about 7 seconds, Fox focused on the bouncing celebration of this woman, who jiggled up and down with her hands over her heads. And there, blazoned on her midriff-revealing black tee-shirt were the words, “Fuck da Eagles.”

I was shocked. Shocked!

I would have thought that this sort of thing would not happen in our America, where a Republican Congress responded to the outrage provoked by Janet Jackson’s wardrobe malfunction by passing a law that allowed for fines of $375,000 per violation of decency standards by television networks.

The instant case cannot be seen as anything other than a pre-meditated attempt to broadcast obscenity into the homes of Americans who had hoped to see the wholesome fellowship of competition that we expect from the NFL.

If you are as shocked as I am, please let the Federal Communications Commission know.

You can file a complaint by E-mail to info@fcc.gov.

You may also choses to contact the Commissioners via E-mail
Chairman Kevin J. Martin: KJMWEB@fcc.gov
Commissioner Michael J. Copps: Michael.Copps@fcc.gov
Commissioner Jonathan S. Adelstein: Jonathan.Adelstein@fcc.gov
Commissioner Deborah Taylor Tate: dtaylortateweb@fcc.gov
Commissioner Robert McDowell: Robert.McDowell@fcc.gov

I know that Fox Broadcasting would like you to let your government know how offended you are. Well, they would if it were CBS, which broadcast Super Bowl XXXVII.

“… and tell ’em Big Mitch sent ya!”